Better.

Mood: Content
Music: Funeral For A Friend - 10:45 Amsterdam Conversation

After a generally bad weekend, i didn't things would get much better today, but surprisingly, I had tons of fun and am in a really good mood despite being really tired. My call time was at 7am for the Red Horse Musik Laban shoot, which has got to be the most fun shoot I have ever done. The crew and the other talents were really cool, plus we all got to be dumb and rock out all day long, so it really didn't feel like work at all. I'm really excited for the plugs to come out, the replays looked pretty cool. The shoot left me pretty tired though, but its all in a days work. I got everyones numbers, since there were some really cool people I met, so I hope to be seeing them around.

The only downside to today was that I still haven't done my work for Arch 1 which I need to finish for Tuesday, and I'm really too drained to do anything right now... I'm probably just going to sleep after dinner and try and get some work when I wake up really early tomorrow. The workshop for the fastfood thing is tomorrow at 3pm, so I guess I'll have to go straight from class, then go straight home and finish up my stuff for tuesday then study for my test. *Crosses fingers* I hope it all works out, I really cannot afford to fail that class. When that's all over and done with, I think I'll reward myself Tuesday night, watch a movie or something... The assistant director from earlier, Bombie, did a indie flick thats showing in UP on Tuesday so I might just hang around campus and catch that while hanging with him, very cool dude.

Wednesday, hopefully I can jam with Hans for a little bit, maybe if we actually jam more we could even join Musiklaban... haha probably not this year... I hope next year. But actually for the most part I gotta do all my catchup work for Arch 2, which needs to be done by Thursday... It's all drawing, so I'm a bit scared, but hey, practice makes perfect. I suppose if I try drawing something other than stick figures, sooner or later I have to AT LEAST improve, even if it's just a little hehe. So yeah, thats my plan for this week, hope it works out, cuz usually plans I make never go as planned. Whatever. *Crosses fingers again* *Yawn* Time to eat and sleep, I'm hungry and tired. Shalom!

Brooding.

Mood: Tempermental
Music: Silverstein - Smashed Into Pieces

For some reason it just seems to be one of those days where you're just mad at the world... Maybe its cuz I'm still an angsty chemical teenager. Maybe its whats been going on. Maybe its the fucking weather. Whatever. Ateneo beat UP. Yay! -_- Not really that big of a deal, but well, it didn't put me in a better mood. Fun watching with my little brother at Araneta though, even though I was like... the only fool on the ateneo side in maroon. Nothing quite like having a shitty weekend then having your eight year old brother tease you about your school losing a basketball game cuz he doesn't know better. You can't get mad at the little dude.

I could have sworn about a week ago things were going great; in fact, if you look at the realities, things SHOULD be great. I mean, I got approved for the Red Horse Musik Laban commercial which we're shooting tomorrow, then also a fastfood commercial, (which I think is pizza hut) I've been getting my shit together in school, I've been having fun with my family and my friends... and yet, it all just fucking sucks and I can't seem to smile about anything. Well, not exactly, but you get my drift. Since the shoot is the whole day tomorrow, I'm going to have to super cram all my plates in today, something I'm not sure I'll be able to do, but I have no choice. First Arch 1 test tuesday, but I might not be able to study cuz the workshop for the fastfood commercial might be then :s Hay, buhay.

At least last night was alright... I mean, it wasn't the best night ever or anything, but it was a kind of catharsis just to be out and about for at least one night this week, as long as I could get my mind off the annoying issues. Work sucks. Hiding Sucks. Games suck. Paranoia sucks. Thinking too much makes everything suck more. I'm getting sick of being let down. Maybe I expect too much from everyone. If you don't wanna talk, I wish you'd just tell me. Lates.

Stress. Sucks.

Mood: Tired
Music: Alexisonfire - Pulmonary Archery

So the school things I mentioned yesterday resolved themselves today. I spent a ridiculous small fortune at national bookstore on materials for the group project... My group mates texted me to meet them in national, and I arrive there to find that the only reason they needed me to go there was cuz they were both broke to buy materials. Great! Well... Hopefully the 'rents will reimburse as I kept the receipt. Still, I don't see why we had to buy balikbayan boxes to use for building materials and not use crap cardboard lying around, as they're 150 pesos a pop, but whatever, whats done is done.

Spent the rest of the day hanging out in the Arki building working on the damn "chica chair;" A ridiculous project that in our minds (literally the entire design class) has absolutely no relevance to the profession we're supposedly learning. But its also common knowledge that our prof for the said class, Dytoc (pronounced Dee-Talk) is a little bit bonkers... Actually, that's a major understatement. The man is nuts. Brilliant, yes. Yeah, well, I guess he's one of those "special" people. Yanna came and visited as she was on campus to see some play that was required by the Ateneo people in one of her classes, but they were out of tickets when she got there so she decided to just hang out... Introduced her to a couple of the arki people. The "Chica chair" was about 70% done when we left around 6:00pm, so hopefully we can put the finishing touches on it tomorrow before class at 1:30, or if Dytoc allows, but the time class is over at 3:30.

I got to talk to my Arch 1 prof (after actually not seeing him or going to his class for about a month) who was actually just surprised to know that I was still alive and attending classes... I was actually expecting him to say I had already failed his class but he's just so cool that he gave me conditions to pass his class. I mean... I was lucky and all, but well.. Now I have my work cut out for me. Can't miss his class the rest of the semester and I have to make up all the work I've missed since schools started. I think I've been to that class three times in total? :s Blargh. Kaya yan. Though I do think I'll be working my ass off over the weekend... I really need to get that bloody drafting table so I can do my plates, not to mention first test is on Tuesday next week so I better get my shit together. Looks like I'll be staying home over the weekend for the first time in a while. Unless I can get the little E to go out. That would be the only exception. Maybe a movie or something. Good news about that today as well, so I'm in good spirits regarding that.

Baby Y and Liana (ie my younger sisters aka the resident Goldilocks girls) are half day tomorrow and no school Friday. The jealousy! Haha. But Baby Y is really sick, so shes probably not going to school tomorrow. Poor thing looks like she's half alive... Hope she gets better soon. I wanted to like... Spoon feed her chicken soup or something, or do anything to help her get better, but whatever. The kiddos about as stubborn as me anyways. I have a VTR tomorrow morning for some alcoholic beverage... its a final casting and the text said "rocker attire." Hopefully I fit the part... desperately could use the extra cash. I just hope its not like Gran Matador Brandy or like Fundador or some other old man shit like that... A beer would be the best case scenario hehe. Oh yeah... got a haircut too... Its about time. My hair grows so damn fast. Its alright I guess. Maybe a tad too short, or maybe im not used to it yet, though I think they did cut it a little to far from the left ear. Whatever.

Anyways, I've been thinking lately to get serious about school for once. I've been on a bloody vacation for almost a year and a half and its about time that I really get serious about something important you know? Before it's too late... I mean, I've had to learn that the hard way before. No real desire to do so again. So yeah, should start this weekend by staying home and doing my work and all that, and hopefully things will pick up as time passes and I get back into the habit of things. PS - Johnny Depp continues to be my idol and the only man I'd go gay for... While he might not be as sexy as normal as Willy Wonka, he's bloody brilliant.. and OH SO WEIRD... Just the way I like it. Anyone who hasn't seen it, I suggest you do so promptly... gotta see the advanced screening last Friday care of the Goldilocks girls. hehehe. Well, that's about it for now, I'm kinda tired, still got work to do... sooooo time to make like titties and bounce dahahahaha!

Just Another Update

Mood: Anxious
Music: Dashboard Confessional - Hands Down

Hmm... Just another day I suppose. Thoroughly uneventful and yet not really so boring. No school today, the usually UP-like chaos... Last minute postponement of class for some odd badly explained reason. I'm not complaining though, I don't need any good reason for no school, just a legitimate one as far as the faculty is concerned. Met some people today that I didn't expect to; an important meeting actually... Just that I was caught a bit unprepared. Hope I made a good impression. Things like that are important with such people. Happy though, saw C :)

School work is piling up... I have a group project due Thursday that we all haven't started, but since there's no school tomorrow, we'll probably end up getting together and doing it then. I'm not TOO worried, but I guess I should be since I'm procrastinator extraordinare. I really should go to my Arch 1 class, but I still haven't done any of the work from like three weeks ago and I haven't been to class since, so I'm a bit scared of actually showing up. It also doesn't help that I still don't have a drafting table to do my plates on at home, but I can't keep using that as an excuse, no matter how true that is because in the end it all amounts to me being too lazy to get something done, whether its the plates themselves or buying a damn drafting table. Well...

Had a close call earlier with the step-mom... she came home and was looking for Baby Y, who happened to be in my bathroom with me smoking... For one, shes not allowed in my room, and on top of that, shes not supposed to be smoking, but I think we're off the hook for now cuz Baby Y pulled a smooth one and said she was just giving me something from C, but i happened to be smoking in the bathroom and she wanted to see my reaction, so she only smelled like smoke because she was there with me. Step-mom didn't mention anything to me after that, so i think we're in the clear *crosses fingers* Never know though, just gotta be a good boy scout and always be prepared. To think that I was just saying to C that Baby Y is bound to get us caught sooner or later always being a step behind... Well, she's still being trained ;) She'll be a pro by the time I'm done with her. But she'll always be Baby Y hahaha. :)

Thats about it for now... making progress with the band again, FINALLY. Should be another jam this week, either thursday or friday. Hans wants to put the finishing touches on his song, and we wanna finalize the first of mine. Still writing by myself in the house and improving old songs... should have at least 6 or 7 by the time Hans and I get around to working together on all of mine, plus however many songs he has. Good number, I'm really excited. Bottom line is I just miss gigging and making music. The faster Hans and I hammer the songs out, we can start jamming with Rozie, hopefully start gigging in a month or two, if all goes well. Look out! Shadows from Headlights on the rise! Word!

It's Been A WHILE...

Mood: Emo
Music: The Spill Canvas - 3685

Months have passed since I've posted last... the urge to would come up every now and then; I'd go to my blog and look over old posts, knowing inside theres so much to let out since my last entry, but laziness, in its typical fashion with me, always got the best of me and hence, never got around to it. This post is my first step in reversing my laziness problem. Maybe if I talk about it a little bit and release some emotions, I'll get around to doing more important relevant things.

So where to begin? It's really been much too long... February i think? Wow. Much too long. That life seems so far away right now. Since then, I've been kicked out of my house, reaccepted, kicked out again, moved out, ended a relationship, started college life and moved houses, with all the usual shannanigans and drama along the way. Hmmm. Maybe when I have more time I'll blab about those things a little more, but right now I just feel like I have a well of emotions that I've been keeping inside and it's about time I had some sort of release, whether its legitimate or therapeutic or whatever. I don't even know what I'm saying now.

School is alright. I don't think I was quite ready to undertake the life it implied when I started school and I'm still having trouble fitting in and adjusting. For one, anyone who knows me in the slightest knows I have an incredible problem with attendence and procrastination, two qualities that are very bad as an architecture major at UP. But hey, I'm making slow progress, but progress nonetheless. At first I also thought there was a major social challenge presented to me in the form of my college and the people there, but lately I've really been quite happy about the relationships I've made and that are continuing to grow, and I have to say now there are some pretty good friends that I have in school.

At home, things are alright. It really is quite nice to be getting to know a family that I never even knew I had, being that I live with my dad and his family now. I'm especially grateful to my sister and kuya that live with me, as they've made the adjustment so much easier and I find in the short time I've known them, I've grown quite close to them. And don't discount everyone else here too, I love them dearly.

My personal life is alright I suppose. I mean, it could be better, but hey, life is constantly a work in progress. You ever get that feeling like something is missing from your life, and you think you know what it is, but then at the same time you kinda have that feeling that even if you were to attain that missing piece, you'd still feel empty? Well.. something like that has come out. I think I need to get some rest cuz I'm not making any sense anymore, but expect more posts now that I'm trying to get back in the habit, hopefully of better quality. Peace out, forgive the nonsensical ranting. Peace.